Why do so many people struggle with self-belief? After all, you’re the only one who can decide what you’re capable of, so you’re the only one you need to convince.
Now, you won’t always be good at everything, immediately. But if you don’t start, there’s nothing to get good at.
One of the biggest hurdles to over come, is the fear of failure, or rejection (Kakorrhaphiophobia). It’s usually top of the ‘issue’ tree for anyone with low self-belief.
So, what can you do?
In this post, I want to give you a few ideas on how to begin moving forward.
Everybody struggles sometimes with believing in their abilities. I know for me, that in the past, I was stuck in my ways. I never dared to venture outside of my structured comfort zone!
Consciously, I believed that I was getting on fine and if I wasn’t doing it already, I probably didn’t need to do it anyway. When in reality, I didn’t do it, because I didn’t think I could.
Of course, I still have days when I’m pretty sure another failure will turn up to bite me. Sometimes, I’ll do things when I know I’ll fail, or won’t be the best I can be. But that’s okay. I’ve learnt that failing is a good thing and not being the best is okay too.
Because, it’s only by failing (or, not fully succeeding) that we can grow and do better next time. It’s only by failing that we seek improvement and it’s only by failing a lot, that we can truly be the best we can be.
Failure is a strong word, but it really just means not being perfect. Not always being right. Not having everyone accept what you’re saying without question. And not having all of the answers to every question.
You need to fail to see where your weaknesses are. It’s the only way to truly learn how to be better and it’s an important part in achieving your goals and dreams.
If you make a mistake, use the feedback it gives you to help understand the problem. Then, learn from the mistake and you’ve grown some more.
Increasing self belief is all about growing as an individual. The best way to grow, is by starting with small, almost irrelevant actions to just go and try.
Then, learn from any mistakes and then try the newer, better version. See every mistake as an opportunity to learn and grow, then get back to trying!
So, here’s some small things that, over time, will help you to grow and increase your level of self belief;
- Step slightly outside your comfort zone every day, push past your initial discomfort and see it as an opportunity to grow.
Stepping outside your comfort zone needn’t be difficult. I could be something as simple as making a call you’ve been putting off, or making a start on your Business Plan, etc. The trick is to do SOMETHING.
- Accept that not everyone’s going to like you. You can’t please everybody, so why not concentrate on pleasing yourself?
If you’re constantly spending your life trying to satisfy everybody else, you’re never going to succeed. You can’t change another person’s feelings, or expectations, so why try.
- Spend your time completing small, positive actions and build on those successes. Before you know it, you’ll realize you really are good enough to do what ever you want. Once you believe it, it won’t matter what anyone else thinks.
- Don’t listen to the negative self-talk that normally holds you back. Your negative gremlin is there to help protect you from danger. It brings your attention to anything that might cause you harm. The thing to remember here, is that it only brings it to your attention. It’s up to you to decide whether you accept it or not. Ask yourself “What’s the worst that could happen?”
- Try going into situations even when you’re not sure of the result and learn to be okay with that. When you decide to take the chance, remember that the greatest successes come from the biggest failures. So it’s okay to struggle, or fail sometimes, you can still be okay in failure. What’s most important, is that you continue to try every day.
Use these strategies on an ongoing basis, and you’ll soon find out you’re much more capable than you thought you were.
And finally, remember that you’re stronger, more competent and more tolerant of initial discomfort, than you think. And you won’t really know if you can do a thing, until you try.
So, go out there and try, learn from your mistakes, then try again! Before you know it, your beliefs about what you can achieve will improve dramatically 🙂